I've been reading a lot of blog postings lately that are reminiscing about when those writers started blogging...back in the day. You know, when it was an online journal. I myself started out at diaryland back in December of 2003. Gosh, that was so long ago. In December of 2003 I was 19 and in my 2nd year of university. I'm 26 now and so much has changed. Unfortunately, the last couple years I've spent allllll my time reading about other people's lives (because they are so fascinating!!!) and not much time at all chronicling my own life. The funny thing though is that each day I compose an entry in my head while driving to work. For real. And then I never put pen to paper or in this case, fingers to keyboard. I am once again vowing to do more of this. Writing every few months or more is just not working for me. I love to write. It gives me an opportunity to reflect on the events of the day and I love that. I suppose that's why I still compose entries in my head all the time. Hmmmm.

Today is a busy day for me. I haven't decided (still!!) how much to share regarding certain key indicators that would identify me. I adore and applaud those who do but am not sure if I can do it yet myself so I suppose I won't be sharing what it is that is so busy about today but rest assured, today is a very important day for me professionaly.

And I just want to say, in case sometimes I forget, that my boyfriend is mighty sweet sometimes. He isn't big on mushy, sentimental things, but this morning he texted to wish me a fun day and wake me up. Awwwwww. lol. But really, I know when he does stuff like that that he actually, truly means it because he isn't about saying things for the sake of saying things. Does that make sense?

Anyway, in closing I hope to be here a lot more often and I hope to be writing a little about what's been going on the last few years to fill in some gaps. I want to be able to remember some of these things when I'm older so I better get cracking!!!

"He's not the type"

Ahh! I hate hearing that. I hate hearing that a man has cheated on his wife (or partner) and then to follow it up, I hate hearing that it was not expected. That no one would have ever seen it coming. I just, it's not that I don't BELIEVE the people saying it. I'm sure they 100% believe what they are saying. That's not why I hate it. I hate it because if they are right, if you NEVER would have predicted he would do something like that then ack! That terrifies me for my future.

I do not sit around worried that someone will cheat on me. I really don't. But when I hear that it's happened to someone it just rips me up inside. I feel awful for them, for everyone affected. I ponder how I'd feel and I just. ugh. Knowing that I would never marry "the type" who would cheat. I know I'd be marrying the "he's not the type" guy so of course, there must always be a chance.

I know what my thoughts are on men who cheat. I have a pretty good idea of how I'd feel if I was cheated on (ripped into pieces). I am pretty sure that I wouldn't tolerate it though even though it hurts to walk away. But, who knows really? You can't say for sure until you're in that position. But removing from the picture the whole What I'd do part (rip his testicles off maybe?), leave or stay, and taking out what I think about cheaters and why they cheat and all that. Stripping it down to just how I'd feel. I have a pretty good idea as to how torn up I'd feel. How distraught. How hurt and angry and broken I'd feel. And so it scares me to think that someone I love could potentially cheat on me and then we'd all be looking back on it going "He's just not the type".